THE AUSTRALIAN OBSESSED QUARTER SCOTTISH PERSON WHO WHO'S FATHER WAS BORN IN GERMANY WHO DOES NOTHING BUT PLAY BOWLS AND ANNOY PEOPLE AN AWFUL AMOUNT!

The title of the first post on my first ever blog on the first of november 2011 symbolises a day of firsts i suppose. today i managed to get over my fear of social contact in the forms of a hug by being hugged by fellow school associates in order to put an end to my mistreatment; see i do not go to an ordinary school for i am not an ordinary person. this is partly due to my genetics as the Sanders family are different to most others we do not think in the normal way as we have what is known to be by scientists 'the perfect male brains' we suffer from aspergers a form of autism which effects our social skills. i am a mild sufferer from it but the thing that has changed me the most from a miserable old fashioned git who wouldn't speak to anyone and would never ever in a million years dream of writing a blog is my love of lawn bowls. i have played many sports during my 16 years but the one i have got most satisfaction from is lawn bowls: some say i'm addicted, some say that's where i belong, but i believe it is neither i think of it as a cure it is compulsory to socialise and talk to people otherwise you will not get any enjoyment from it which will prevent you from bowling well. also it works as a stress realease as there is nothing more relaxing then seeing your bowl (or massive pomegranites as my mature team mates call them) right next to the jack. I was born in Aylesbury in a hospital famous for creating the paralympics, i lived there till i was 2 years old, before being whisked to the south coast to a place famous for lawn bowls, Worthing again i lived there for 2 years before moving to Southam in Warwickshire which is just down the road from Leamington again famous for lawn bowls i lived in southam for 5 years surviving my first years of primary school. i don't remember a lot about primary school but what i do know is that i was lonely, unsociable, above my peers intellectually and last but not least i hated the fact that i changed teachers every year. i had to adjust to a new classroom new teaching methods different size chairs a new group of people bullying me for my well covered abdominal region (i was a little bit overweight kind of) putting my bag in a new place all the things aspergic people hate. but one thing never changed and that was my undying love for formula 1. i've always thought of f1 as a third parent although now i kind of call it my substitute for not having a female companion but formula 1 will always come first i haven't missed a race in 16 years! it wasn't till i got the oppurtunity to spend a week at the williams f1 factory in Grove through beating 270 people for a weeks work experience that i discovered people that shared the same passion for something i had. after 5 unpleasently supposedly happy years and another sibling being born (my brother Fraser) to go along with my sister Erin (who was born in Worthing) we travelled to a new continent a new hemisphere a new country a new house, new people. An Aspergics worst nightmare!. we moved to Australia the land of the green and gold a place where we left England as a family of 5 and returned a family of 4 thanks to my fathers alternative housing arrangements and fake work trips and holidays to someone elses bedroom. i loved everything else about Australia we nearly had it all and i was being poached as a potential international swimmer aged 10 but due to my aspergers again i failed to realise it and it was an oppurtunity gone for ever. i returned to Abingdon to the place i currently am writing this blog when i should be in bed. however you the readers of this blog are the ones that in my opinion matter most as you are the people i will moan too the people i will look for to support my desires to one day run this overcrowded strange smelling unmotivated underachieving country! for i am JPJ Sanders and i pledge a war on everything that stands in my way or generally irritates or repulses me (so people generally). there will be no surrender on my behalf till there are no longer teenage pregnancies, no longer will there be a tory lib dem coalition, no longer will bowls be a sport for old people and no longer will the fat man be sterotyped as a useless sportsman!