i sit on the science stools, next to master Harris and Miss Jones. duck the utensils thrown by Mr Greenwood whisper things into miss Jones ear about Mrs Downes while she's distracted by Miss Shipway. gossip about who's been up to what, who should be with who, who's become even uglier, who has improved that sort of thing that i'm famous for. today though my fun was interrupted by the creation of a mind map all about 'ME THE GREATEST' which mr put on his. i had to put my hobbies and interests (lawn bowls, politics, cycling, sport, athiesm) my school achievements (rugby, gold certificate, history achievement award) all of which i achieved in year 7 don't know where it all went downhill from there but it has! also there was past work experiences for which i could put 2 weeks sitting on my arse talking bowls to Miss Greenways grandad, as well as the highlight of my life crushingly defeating, humiliating, bewildering, marooning 270 people for a weeks work experience (or groping formula 1 cars and getting excited by the smell of carbon fibre cooking). putting personal qualities was a bit of a challenge i almost had to get another peice of paper i could list so many i started with modesty because i think this is my best quality! we added lots of other things to this mindmap including your plans for the future. i put 3 things, 2 realistic the other 1 in case something as disastrous happened like S-club breaking up, a labour/lib dem coalition, Boris Johnson not being the mayor of London. so plan A was simple become prime minister of this interesting island, plan B even simpler own a formula 1 team or be the commercial rights holder (what Bernie Ecclestone currently does). now for the back up plan become an accountant after all i'm alright at maths i live a boring lifestyle i can use microsoft excel, i'm not the most handsome of gentlemen (an example of my modesty), i lack a intentional sense of humour and i revell in routine. in fact all these possible occupational vacancies i get paid an extortionate amount of money to do a lot in a short space of time then spend the rest of time talking about how i won at bowls last night or attempt to impress some females with my story of the Sanders tradition of abandoning your children and doing one better than their father. 'my great grandfather abandoned my grandfather in Scotland, my grandfather abandoned my father in germany and my father abandoned me in Australia, so i'm going to push the boat out and aim to abandon my marvellously challenged cherubs in space'. but the thing that annoys me most is a lack of ambition. so todays war possum is against those amongst us who do not reach for the starts as well as not aspiring to climb every mountain higher than it has been climbed before.
there is nothing i find more annoying in society than a lack of ambition, theres no point in just achieving your potential or setting your potential yourself because that is all you'll ever achieve what's the point in becoming just a hairdresser when you could be the best that has ever graced peoples hair with scissors. cut hair belonging to such people as Sir JPJ Sanders PM or his lawyer Lord Allen. if you do not strive to exceed your goals then you are not trying your best, if you are not trying your best, you are not doing it properly or to an appropriate standard meaning that you are not respecting your profession, disrespecting all of those that do their jobs properly every day which is not fair on the consumer. see the attitude of i'll 'JUST' become a hairdresser ist nicht gut genug fur mich! (is not good enough for me!) you have to want to be something in order to do it properly, my mother wanted to be a speech therapist she went to Edinburgh university got a degree in speech therapy here we are today with my mother currently in a travelodge working in a specialist school for autism and aspergers as a speech therapist in Southend. see in order to have a career in your profession you have to make sacrifices be dedicated and adjustable otherwise you don't have the desire to be a successful member of your profession. it's people like these that make my blood boil, these: unmotivated, unambitious, hard partying, casual rumpy bumpier, depressed, unsettled, stressed out, miserable, facebook moaning, confused, ungrateful, failures of humanity, unchallenged, alcohol dependant in order to forget their problems, coffee drinking, jeremy kyle watching, socialist supporting, untidy, unsupported, all inclusive holiday goers, child neglecting, miss sexy trouser wearing, horrendous heel blisterers, Blackpool weekend retreaters and worst of all blame other people for their failings. we are all responsible for our luck in this world as we make our own oppurtunities, over 270 people applied for a weeks work experience at Williams f1 we all aplied through writing an essay and a letter to them. yet for some reason they picked mine, was it my essay or the effort i've put in past projects that impress them. sp troops lets take a whip each, find one of these unambitious lay abouts strike them with our egyptian whips till they beg for mercy (hit them a few more times just so they actually change their ways) make them work harder, achieve more, enjoy the feeling of satisfaction i get pressing the publish button at the end of each post and most of all make them more respectful to those that do put the effort in.
the way to change them is relatively simple we need to chuck them into the unknown give an incentive for them to try their best because no one cares what happens unless you try your best and have worked as hard as you can. culture is a forever changing thing once one person changes everyone will be pretty soon to follow make them realise the benefits of ambition because without ambition you achieve very little satisfaction and mainly feel guilt at the oppurtunity you are wasting, deprieving someone who would put their all into it from putting their all into it. so what we need is someone who has no shortage of inspiration, motivation, ambition and lots of other things ending with ion. someone who is constantly exposed to these people. someone who is never afraid to make their feelings known to all someone who is prepared to marvellously manipulate modesty into a manner that allows people to preech how beautifully brilliant they are inspire inconspicuously the masses stamp on modesty give it what it deserves modesty gets you know there modesty gets you to your tiptoes acquire arrogance intercept ignorance climb the nearest mountain never say no always say yes look back at what you've achieved remember how you overcame the hard times apply them to the future, listen to s-club, pay attention to peers, revell under the pressure, be proud of yourself and your profession. reach for the stars climb every mountain and that rainbow will come and shine on you making your dreams, desires aspirations no longer be dreams, desires or aspirations but reality. because there aint nothing you can't be you can be whatever you want to be with all the talents you possess!
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